The town I grew up in had a bunch of pretty lakes around it. But the lake-front space wasn’t always used well.
For example, there was one stretch that would have been great for parks and restaurants.
Instead, they put car dealerships and tech stores. Which blocked the lake like it wasn’t even there.
It was a waste of real estate.
I bring this up because this mistake happens a lot in copy. Particularly Success Story pages.
Here’s what I mean:
This is a great success story page by Melissa Pharr.
It’s loaded with videos of people singing her praise and sharing what it was like to work with her.
And the blurbs below each video show the incredible results her clients got.
But take a look at this section of the page.
What jumps out at you?
The most in-your-face part of the copy is the person’s name.
But that’s the least important part of the story!
Now if you’ve got a testimonial from Lady Gaga, Lebron James, or some big name your audience knows, then, by all means, make that name front and center.
But if nobody knows who these people are…why make the name so prominent?
Instead, use that valuable real estate to highlight something the reader cares about.
Such as the RESULTS that person got working with you.
Take the middle story. That first line “$15,000 in her first month!” should be front and center.
It’s the most compelling part. Instead of burying it, make it impossible to miss.
The second tweak I’d make is this:
Those blurbs do a great job highlighting results.
What they miss is the struggle beforehand.
This matters because it provides context.
For example, the one on the left mentions how this person booked 22 calls and had her first $5k month.
Okay… but how does that compare with where she was? How many calls was she getting before? Did she go from $4,700/month to $5,000? Or $500 to $5,000?
Sharing results is great. But providing context makes them far more powerful.
Because it shows the transformation. And gives the reader a chance to connect with the story.
They’ll read how this person went from unable to get calls booked and think: “That’s me!”
Then see how this person soon got 22 calls booked and think: “That’s amazing! I want that!”
Overall though, the is great.
Simply having it puts Melissa miles ahead of most others.
But these little tweaks can help make sure you make the best use of your real estate.
So you can show readers your overwhelming proof your stuff works for them.
And avoid losing sales to a competitor who may not be as good but does a better job showing off their proof.